faster, higher, stronger, more expensive

I watched the opening ceremony for the 2008 Olympics in Beijing earlier tonight. Well, not all of it – even in the summer I struggle to find four spare hours in a row. I have to say that, like seemingly everyone, I spent most of the time with my mouth open. It was an incredible spectacle.

If the object had been to take China’s human rights record off people’s minds for a couple of hours they certainly succeeded with me. As I watched those fireworks, and the drummers all moving in unison creating a massive single entity, and the huge globe with the gravity defying people, and the wonderful way they lit the torch – for a moment human rights didn’t enter my conscious – I became a child looking at his first ever fireworks display again – my mouth formed the shape it makes when it stops midway through uttering a ‘wow’ and stayed like that.

Of course I’m back in righteous indignation mode again – and will say a silent prayer for those who were screwed up and crushed in the creation of a state which thinks nothing of spending billions on a global event but treats its poor so shoddily.

I firmly believe that China should not have been awarded the Olympics in the first place – but the time for protesting that decision is over, anything more can only be considered grandstanding and will do more harm than good.

So let the games commence – and credit to the people who made that crazy opening ceremony come together and said so clearly – ‘follow that, London!’

funeral porn

A friend once asked me to witness a list of requests for her funeral. This included lots of bright colours, a rendition of ‘Tainted Love’, and a selection of Tennessee Williams scenes to be performed by me and my, then, love interest. There were other outlandish inclusions and I still have a copy of them somewhere. At twenty-seven I imagine she may have time to change her mind and opt for something more traditional. However times are changing. Funeral ceremonies are bound to follow in the way of the wedding ceremony which is evolving at an ever more rapid pace. However I don’t think even my extrovert of a friend would consider some of the activities found at funerals in certain areas of China.

A new funeral tradition of employing exotic dancers to perform a strip tease for the mourners started in Taiwan and the province of Fujian in the late 70s, becoming quite popular by the mid 80s. Understandably the conservative mainland authorities are none too amused and have started clamping down on this unorthodox practice. They can’t ban the custom, as technically it is already illegal. But who’s going to arrest a recently bereaved relative for vice crimes? Well the Chinese are.

Recently CCTV (the state broadcaster) ran a report about strippers at a funeral. Within hours police had arrested organisers and some of the dancers for “obscene performances." Guidelines are now in place requiring organisers to submit plans for funerals within hours of the deceased passing.

Funerals in China have always been a jolly affair compared to western standards. Mourners wear white and there is much music and fireworks. But to have strippers perform in front of families of mourners? Why?

Academics seem as confused as the rest of us according to the quick search of bulletin boards and publications I carried out. I have read at least eight conflicting views from professors of Asian Studies in Harvard, Magill, Virginia, Cornell, Otago, Stockholm and Edinburgh. They concur that this is a relatively recent phenomenon but that is as far as they agree. Some of the reasons suggested:

Performing arts have always been a part of East Asian funerals – as strip tease becomes a more popular part of the performing arts it has moved in on the funeral scene. – Seems unlikely to me. Exotic dancing is illegal in the Chinese arts scene.

The erotic dance represents the virility of the male deceased. – Doesn’t work as some of these strippers perform at the funerals of women.

The dances are performed to scare away demons. – Unlikely on two levels, Demons are traditionally attracted to eroticism and it seems too recent to be used for superstitious reasons.

The deceased was into porn in his life so requested it. The children of the deceased book the strippers to honour their father. Filial piety – There is one example I could find for this but it doesn’t explain the ones who don’t request it, or the women. Surely they can’t all have been hooked on porn?

It is simply one way that the population of Taiwan can thumb their noses at the Mainland authorities. – I quite like this one but it doesn’t explain the custom happening in Fujian. Also Taiwanese authorities seem no less opposed than the mainland ones.

Personally I am inclined to believe there is a less controversial reason. Now I am no academic, and this is based on a very short study of Buddhism and East Asian Customs so it may be completely left field. But. I’m led to believe that many of the customs involved in a traditional Chinese funeral ceremony are there to ease the passage of the deceased into their rebirth – their journey into the next life. One thing that the gods are impressed by is popularity and power. What better way of displaying your popularity than having hundreds of people at your funeral. Families often put on feasts and entertainment for this very reason – The shock value of having girls dancing about in the nude is bound to draw in the crowds.

Somebody may provide reasons to rubbish this theory but in the meantime it’s the best I can do. Asian cultures are fascinating in so many ways. Neighbouring cultures contradict each other totally. I don’t think I could understand them fully if I studied them for decades so instead I’m off to Spearmint Rhino to book it for my wake.