there goes all our dignity

Big financial news in the UK where Richard Branson and a bunch of friends have decided to have a go at taking over Northern Rock.

A consortium led by Sir Richard Branson's Virgin Group has put forward plans to take control of Northern Rock. Under the plans, Northern Rock would keep its stock market listing but would be rebranded as Virgin Money.

This is all very well but surely it can only be seen as bad news for us Newcastle United supporters. If our club's sponsor is taken over by Richard Branson does that mean we'd have to go to the matches in shirts with Virgin written across the chest? Like we don't get made fun of enough already?

sportsman, statesman, gentleman

A statue was unveiled in Coleraine this afternoon. Created by Ross Wilson, it was of a local football player who died two years ago. Bertie Peacock played for Northern Ireland and Celtic, managing his country (and Colerine) in the 60s. He was a legend – but not in the way that ‘legend’ has come to be defined.

Think of legends in the modern era and names such as Beckham, Zidane, Ronaldo etc come to mind. These are men who have made a fortune out of the game, married famous, beautiful women (in the case of Vicky B that’s maybe a matter of opinion, I’ll maybe substitute famous and rich women in her case) and live their lives under the intense glare of media scrutiny. Modern “legends” often appear more often in the gossip sections of the tabloids than in the sports section. It could be suggested that they have sold their souls to the devil that is celebrity. I, of course, would never make such a sweeping judgement, but it could be suggested by others perhaps.

Perhaps the most famous local sporting legends, George Best and Alex Higgins, were undoubtedly amazing talents. They could be, irrefutably, described as geniuses in their respective fields. They could also have been described as having major flaws that, again, led them to appear outside the sports pages. We love them for what they were able to do, we loved them because they grew up in places we recognise, but we pity them for what they allowed to happen to themselves. We feel admiration for their rise to fame and we feel pity for their decline into infamy.

The concept of “legend” has certainly evolved through the ages. Which brings me back to Bertie; a man who doesn’t fit either of the previous definitions. He was a naturally gifted player who became an immensely respected leader who went on to leave a legacy to his profession through the founding of the Milk Cup, an international youth football tournament in Northern Ireland.

According to historical references (my dad and the maths teacher from across the corridor from my previous classroom) footballers in Peacock’s day were a different breed. They travelled on the bus to the matches, hung around for a drink with the fans in the local, got stick from their mates at work on Monday morning if they’d played badly at the weekend. They talk fondly of a time when the players of Coleraine football club were a local bunch – born and raised within a few miles of the ground. They lived among the fans – they were fans themselves. Now I know Peacock can’t claim to have been born and raised among the fans when he moved to Celtic – but I know the fans in Glasgow took him as one of their own and respected him as much as we did over here – of course it helped that he captained them to league and cup glory in his time there.

I didn’t know the man personally (The thing for which I most admire him, leading Coleraine to their only league title, took place three years before I was born) but I know enough people who consider him a close friend and who can think of no bad thing to say about the man to know that he was truly special. As far as I can tell he didn’t marry a super model, didn’t own a super car, didn’t get Christmas cards from film stars. Yet I’m glad they unveiled a statue of him in Coleraine. In the way that Joey Dunlop represented greatness in Ballymoney and was rightly remembered and honoured by the town, Bertie Peacock embodies qualities that the residents of Coleraine could do worse than to use as an example. Just look at the base of the statue for examples - sportsman, statesman, gentleman.

back in my day women knew their place

Congratulations to Jacqui Oatley for becoming the first female commentator in British televised football history today. And a mighty fine job she did of it too. A little nervous at times I felt but that was understandable.What wasn’t understandable is the national debate the whole event spawned. I was aghast at some of the comments respected pundits were making. People I used to respect were coming out with some prehistoric comments that did nothing to protect the image of the game. It simply made them look like a bunch of dinosaurs.

The Earth didn't shift on its axis last night. Match of the Day went on air at 10.30pm and Manchester United's draw with Middlesbrough led the programme. Gary Lineker, Alan Shearer and Lee Dixon presented and discussed the issues, closing titles were run before midnight and everyone went home. Somewhere in there, a woman commentated on a football match on BBC 1. In and around that, a few people lost their sense of perspective.
Niall Sloane - BBC Head of Football

Jimmy Greaves, Dave Bassett et al let themselves down a bagful with their paranoid rants. I can only imagine that they are scared that women will take over the world and imprison us non-females in underground caves. Although it has to be said that some of their comments belong more in caveman drawings than modern football.

"Commentary is different. You must have an understanding of the game and thetactics, and I think in order to do that you need to have played the game."

Dave Bassett

Arguments that only ex footballers understand the game enough to commentate on it effectively can be rejected on two counts. One – some of the best male commentators never played the game competitively. And two – Oatley is an ex footballer. She played the game until a knee injury forced her to retire and take up reporting.

It is an insult to the controlled commentaries of John Motson, Mike Ingham and Alan Green that their domain is threatened by a new arrival whose excited voice sounds like a fire siren.
Steve Curry - Sportsmail football writer

As for the idea that women don’t have the correct voice for football commentary- well I have two words for that – Jonathan and Greening. Here we have a highly respected commentator who is praised for his calling of soccer matches. The only problem I have with the man is that whenever the ball enters either penalty area only dogs can actually make out what he’s saying. Oh it’s great for conveying excitement but not so great for actually following a game. Please please please never let that man near radio commentary or we’ll all be in the dark.

I love football – I’m a great admirer of BBC commentary – I love Alan Green, Mike Ingham and I have been very impressed by Jacqui Oakley’s commentaries on Radio 5. She is knowledgeable, always prepares well and is great at conveying what is happening on the pitch. The only problem she faces is that she’s the first – and the first always has to clear the debris on their way through.

Northern Ireland 2 Sweden 1

Once again little Norn Iron punch above their weight and move to the top of their section in the European Qualifiers. This time Fortress Windsor Park witnessed them coming from behind to add Sweden to their list of conquests. And once again it was (sir) David Healy who scored the goals for them.

There are people out there wondering why it is that he constantly scores important goals for Northern Ireland against world class opposition like Sweden and Spain yet can’t seem to score against Coca-Cola Championship teams for Leeds United. While Northern Ireland are top of their table due to Healy’s goals (he’s scored 9 of their 10 goals in the competition – in only 6 matches) Leeds are languishing in last place in their table – and Healy has only scored 8 goals in 28 appearances.

It was David Healy who eventually broke the 1298 minute goal drought that Northern Ireland were suffering a couple of years ago. It was David Healy who reduced Ian Wright (BBC pundit) to a great big huff when his goal beat England soon after. Yet David Healy can’t even get a place in a Leeds side that is really struggling to avoid relegation. Why is that?

If we give David Healy chances he will score. He had two chances and scored both - top class, world class finishing.
N Ireland Coach, Lawrie Sanchez

Well they don’t play him from the start of the match regularly enough. Often they play him out of position. I don’t know – maybe he just likes the fact that he is the big star in the team when he plays for NI.



To be honest I don’t know and I don’t care. I just like the fact that he scores goals for his country – I’ll leave Dennis Wise to ponder the rest.



The one thing that annoyed me most yesterday was TV. During the match itself I was doing sound for a play in Bangor. All I could do was check the BBC website for the scores on my phone. It was alright – the BBC were going to be showing highlights later on when the show had finished. After the strike I went to the green room and turned the TV on.



A Match of the Day Special. Highlights from all four home countries European qualifiers… except it wasn’t really. In a 45 minute slot the “highlights” of an abysmal England game against the mighty Andorra took 35 minutes. The Northern Irish game was shown in under 2 minutes – what was the reasoning behind that then? I can only assume that some power-that-be decided that more of the population would want to see England play than Scotland, Wales or Northern Ireland. But then I didn’t realise that the BBC was there to serve the majority at the expense of the minority. Anyway I won’t rant anymore – I was annoyed.



Luckily I think there’s a good chance that I got more enjoyment out of our two minutes than any England fan got out of their thirty five. And David Healy has something in common with the England players – he’s scored nine goals in the competition, and so have they.

an irishman abroad

Don't transfer windows make football exciting? I know you probably don't like to admit it but I'm sure many of you were on the edge of your seats with tension wondering whether the free transfer of Steve Aitken from Stranraer to Stenhousemuir (two of my favourite Scottish teams) was going to go through without a hitch in the final seconds of the window; I know you shook your head, as I did, when Ashley Young joined Villa for almost £10 million - I could hear you: "He's good... but £10 million!" You sighed when Hearts brought Tomas Kancelskis over on loan because you knew that here was yet another player whose name you would struggle to chant at the next Edinburgh derby... I know you did all of that - we all did, and it's ok to admit it.

But my favourite signing of all was Reading bringing Alan Bennett over from Cork for an undisclosed fee. I'm assuming the 72 year old Playwright will slot seamlessly into the Reading defence where he will be expected to use his height to deal with crosses and make dry comments about his family in a Yorkshire accent.

As a Newcastle fan I have long learned to ignore the majority of comings and goings in January. Even when we do sign someone decent he gets injured after two games and we're forced to play the twelve year old son of the reserve team coach anyway. I've even become immune to the money thats thrown around the league these days - Although if I can't pay off my student loan soon I may be forced to sell some of my year 8 literacy group. In the meantime I'm off to the old Vic to see a musical by Watford's new goalie.

lacking motivation

So Carlo Ancelotti, the AC Milan Football Club Coach said that his club's latest target, Ronaldo, isn't fat - he's just "lacking motivation in training."Well last night I ate some chilli chips and I'm lacking all kinds of motivation in training - mainly round the waist.

I'm glad it's not like this all the time

A week or two ago I wrote a post all about watching Derry City play in a chip shop in Ballymena - that's me watching it in a chip shop, not them playing in a chip shop. It was a post of joy and optimism. A post proclaiming love and peace in a country thought of as a recovering war zone. I was uplifted writing it.

Now I am crestfallen.Coming from Northern Ireland it is hard to avoid topics of religion and politics. If you see a film in NI it generally mentions the "situation" Plays set in Ulster tend to have a group of loyalists and a group of republicans playing montagues and capulets, stand up comedy routines tend to have at least one Big Ian reference - they're not funny otherwise. It's hard to avoid these topics, but not impossible. A group of us make short films in this country and I can't remember one reference to "the troubles" - unless you count a prank involving an Irishman in Camp David wearing a balaclava.

I had intended this blog to be sectarian free but thinking back over the past couple of months I can point to at least six posts with something to do with political religion in Northern Ireland. and here I am about to write number seven - I guess I failed.

You see it's like this. Derry were playing the return leg of that football tie in Paris last night. I went back to Ballymena to stand outside that chip shop waving my rangeltic scarf (creating it involved mutilating two separate football scarves to make one but I think it was worth it) If I thought I would witness a similiar show of bon ami I was sadly mistaken. Two drunks paying no attention to the football and a rather angry looking youth who called me jaffa scum because I was wearing a hearts shirt. I left despondent.

A friend of mine lives in a loyalist area of Derry, or should we say Londonderry. Her nephew is the result of a mixed marriage and is being brought up a a Protestant in a Catholic area. She told me today how she had picked him up from Boys' Brigade last night. They had gone to buy stickers in a shop near her house and as they were leaving the shop he looked up at her and said, "It's just as well we went to your shop and not ours. Cause if we went to ours they would have see me in this uniform and known I was Protestant." He's four. So young, so cynical. She said it nearly brought tears to her eyes - it very nearly brought tears to mine.

Things have improved. Things are improving. I just wish they'd hurry up a bit.

the french, the brandywell and some rotten chips

I was in a Ballymena chip shop last night (no surprise there then) watching Derry City playing football against Paris Saint Germain [now, for the uninitiated and for the purposes of this story, it is important that you know that Ballymena is a largely unionist town (Ian Paisley is their MP - nough said) and that Derry City are perceived to be a nationalist football club (they are a northern irish team playing in the southern irish league - nough said)

You could say I was surprised, then, by the level of support Derry were getting from the shaven head, UDA tattooed, rangers shirt wearing locals. There we all were, eyes glued to the screen, all willing our food to take 90 odd minutes to cook, and all, to a man, supporting the men in red and white.

There was even a highly amusing moment when a PSG player barged into Kevin McHugh in the penalty area. As the referee waved away pleas for a spot kick one rather large monobrowed customer gave off "Get to **** you fenian ******! That was a penalty!" It was a moment that, could I get away with it, I would use as an example of irony in my lessons for years to come.

Despite the fact that the match was being played at fortress Brandywell and that PSG fielded a weakened team, the 0-0 result was a fantastic reward for the Candy men and we cheered and hollered and waved our arms in the air as the final whistle was blown. The chips were awful though.

look into their eyes - what can you see?

Do you see joy at the prospect of a goal bonus? Do you see excitement at the thought of moving to a bigger club? Maybe you see relief at the fact that the tabloid press will be positive rather than slating you? Or perhaps you see nothing more than unadulterated ecstasy at scoring a goal for your country against all odds.

Healy, Gillespie and the rest of Lawrie Sanchez's Green and White Army - We salut you.

we're not Brazil, we're Norn Iron

Congratulations to Northern Ireland - I'm typing this with 4 minutes left of a game against Spain - We're leading 3-2 but even if [Oh! great save Taylor!!!] they lose 4-3 it'll be the result of the year.

England only managed 1-0 against Macedonia? Scotland 2-1 against Lithuania - If this stays the same for a few more minutes I think we can claim to be champions of Britain - for a few days anyway. Crouch could only manage one, Healy has scored a hat trick - three goals against one of the best teams in the world - I think that makes him Britains best striker - for a few days anyway...

...until he returns, with the rest of his countrymen to the lower leagues and Crouch and Terry etc resume collecting wages in the premiership.

This is what makes this game so great. I'm so proud I could burst. Spain are in the top 7 in the world. If I was a betting man I could have got 11-1 on a Northern Irish victory [Another great save!!!]

30 seconds - and I know I'm not being very lucid. The 90 minutes are up. Into injury time.

three minutes of injury time - this is torture!

Spain are throwing everything at us.

1 minute left! It has to be... please let it be. I haven't felt like this since we beat England...

thirty seconds... it's a corner! no, a goal kick,

surely that's the end...

We won! WE WON!!! We won!

We're not Brazil we're Northern Ireland

We're not Brazil we're Northern Ireland

We're not Brazil we're Northern Ireland

But It's all the same to me!

I'll make more sense tomorrow - I promise.

conspiracy theory - coleraine style

Is it an unfortunate mistake on the part of the organisers? Surely our esteemed goalie didn't misread the the dress-code on the invitation? I believe it is yet another conspiracy against Coleraine Football Club.

On the back page of today's News Letter there is a photo showing representatives from teams competing in the CIS Insurance cup this season. Now look closely and you will see that the player second on the left is not wearing his team's official kit. While everyone else is sporting their colours proudly Davy O'Hare has turned up in a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a coleraine polo shirt. It is obviously an attempt by the powers that be to stop Coleraine showing off their lovely new diadora strip, thus people won't be encouraged to buy it and Coleraine will continue to have money problems. Terrible state of affairs. Well we can all put it right - if each reader of this post goes out and buys a Coleraine shirt... then there'll be three more sold than would have been sold otherwise.

I'm just glad Coleraine are there at all (clubs colours or no.) It was this time last year that we'd started a season not knowing whether we'd be there the following week. I remember vividly the "last ever game." It was against local rivals (well, not really rivals) Portstewart. I can't describe how it feels watching a team, listening to their heart monitor get slower and slower and waiting for the end. We played Portstewart again two days ago and won 6-2. How times have changed. Anyway it gladened my heart to read the statement on Coleraine's website from the IFA saying they can find no reason why Coleraine should be excluded from the league this year. Onwards and upwards. And don't worry Davy, you may not be in kit like the rest of those posers but you look like you could take any of them in a fight.

teenage kicks

As I type this I should really be at the final of a youth football tournament held in this area called the Milk Cup. I go every year - Its a kind of bonding thing with my father - we don't talk to each other in words of more than one syllable all year until this week - when we go and have one syllable conversations while watching football. Unfortunately this year I have family issues and a friends wants me to go with him to visit a recently married mutual school friend. This whole married friends thing is something I will probably talk about many times in the future - so I'll leave it for now and return to the good old Northern Ireland Milk Cup.

Its an odd kind of a set up with competitions in three age groups and a mix of international and club teams playing each other. Where else could you watch County Antrim battling it out with Man Utd for a chance to play Chile? And what's more, even when a team gets beaten they don't have to fly home shamefaced (like England after Portugal so cruelly conspired to rile the utterly innocent young Liverpudlian into, justifiably, trying to perform a foot vasectomy on an opponent - thus denying the rightful Cup Winners a place in the semifinal) where was I? Oh, when a team get knocked out of one of the tournaments they simply start competing in another one at a slightly lower level. How wonderfully politically correct! I love it!

Could politics not work in a similar way? Take the US where, some people might believe, they can't run a peanut poll let alone a free and just Presidential Election. Say some Republican guy wins the overall election by three votes in a retirement state by the coast - the Democrat candidate wouldn't lose as such; he'd simply enter another Presidential Contest in some other country, say Australia. It could work! We could have John Kerry taking on David Davis for First Minister of the Northern Irish Assembly. No, that's ridiculous! As if we could actually have an assembly!

So while I'm not at the showgrounds watching the USA take on Paraguay in the elites, Spartak Moscow taking on Rapid Vienna in the seniors and Swindon taking on Crumlin Town (who?) in the juniors, I am there in spirit. I am there willing on the underdog. I am there with a lump in my throat for these, the best 6 youth teams in the world right now, three of whom will lift the milk cup (cups?)... but more than that I am there for the teams contesting the Dunluce Trophies, the BT Trophies, and all those teams who aren't the best six in the world but still have their own personal trophies. May we all lift our cups with pride.



update:
Just to keep you informed (I know how worried you all were) it turns out the matches were all broadcast live on BBC TV. So I got to see them after all. If you're interested Paraguay beat the US in the elite final, Swindon won the Juniors and those crafty Spartakians took the senior cup back to Moscow.