I met Mr. C on accident. I thought his blog: The Thoughts of Special Needs Teacher meant that he was a Special Ed Teacher. As it turned out, the title was in regards to his own "Special Status", and not that of his students.The first post I ever read was "Reasons Why I'm Single: Part 2 of 78."
And I became hooked. His dry, witty sense of humor is only surpassed by his propensity to denounce his brilliance with a modest yet endearing insistence. After some feeble resistance on his part- and complete disregard for a "no" answer on my part- Mr C has granted me an interview. I have departed somewhat from the standardized questions- since I felt like an Irish Substitute would have a slightly different take on things.
As always, Brazen Students treat newcomers the way they would like to be treated. That means lots of comments and complimentary visits to the Irishman's blog space. Please relocate your eyes to the front of the class. After party cocktails can be found here.
What’s your horoscope sign?
I’m an aquarian. Some of the greatest people I know are; Humphrey Bogart, Paul Newman, Wayne Gretzky, Charles Dickens, Abraham Lincoln and, er, Jerry Springer.
You describe yourself as a: “a cynical Irish sub, who hasn’t been able to keep down a job in his 6 - 7 years of teaching.” Please elaborate:
Um, did I say that? Sometimes I should learn to sit in the corner and keep my mouth shut. That may take a while to explain. Ok. Well, I’m cynical because I’m Irish (well Northern Irish) and it is ingrained in us. If you read any Northern Irish blogger regularly you will see what I mean. I think it’s a defense mechanism. If we present ourselves and life around us in the worst possible light then people won’t be disappointed in us. It’s certainly the case with me. I prefer others to see the positives of the world of education and specifically in my teaching – meanwhile I’ll pick out the negatives and see if I can make them funny.
The ‘holding down a job bit’ is an example of me being modest of course. True I am working in my fifth school in seven years – but that’s because I have commitment issues – really I do. I also have ‘saying things I shouldn’t before being interviewed and giving the interviewer material’ issues.
How many years have you been teaching?
I had to work that one out for the answer above. As a substitute teacher it’s often hard to keep track – but I started in Sept 2001 – so seven.
What subject(s) do you specialize in?
I’m trained in English Language, Literature and Drama. But so far I have taught (in chronological order): Technology and Design, Maths, Art, English, Special Needs, History, ICT, Drama, Moving Image Arts, and English Literature. I love being a sub.
Since most Brazen readers are American- can you please explain to them how Public Ed is structured in Ireland?
This is now the fourth time I have drafted this answer – the last three attempts each began to take on the proportions of a Tolstoy novel. So this time I have determined to make it as short as is possible:
4-11 we have primary school (like your elementary perhaps?) then we do a test to see what kind of secondary school we get to attend. 11-14 we have three years of stress-free educating before beginning the GCSE course. This is a broad 2 year course of around ten different subjects leading to the first major set of external qualifications. Then at 16/17, if we choose to stay on, we can do another 2 year course called A-levels. This time we specialize in only 3 or 4 subjects. These results are what determine what we do at university. And congratulations – you may now leave the building.
That was the abridged, sanitized version which omitted all traces of the fact that I hate our system and, when the revolution finally comes, I will be at the front holding the flag. It also omitted complications and exceptions that confuse the whole grammar/high/comprehensive/
I’ve lost the will to live – can we move on?
What was the reason you decided to be a teacher?
I don’t really know. Throughout my time in school I was determined to be anything other than a teacher. Then one day I was working night shift in a coffee shop in Ontario and one of my regulars said “have you ever thought of teaching?” I think he may actually have dozed off and was sleep talking; but the seed was planted and within six months I was back home in Ireland training to be a teacher. I often wonder how that sleeping coffee addict is doing. I just hope he can live with himself.
What is one thing you love about teaching?
Pay day. No really. It’s the day I get to look at what this society expects me to survive on while turning their kids into little dead poets society members. It’s when I look at that pay slip that I realize I must be doing it for more than the money.
And that I get to randomly quote Shakespeare at youngsters and claim its part of my ‘job’.
What is one thing you um, don’t?
Being faced with the occasional utterly apathetic parent who feels I am morally responsible for the upbringing of their child. Let’s face it – anyone who actually knows me knows how bad an idea it would be to rely on me as the role model for any impressionable weans.
If you could share one thing about your profession with non-teachers, what would it be?
I think it’d be that we’re actually human beings – and we respond to praise and criticism the same as everyone else. And that sometimes we have off days like everyone else. And that sometimes a bit of recognition goes a long way. The actual pupils are good at that (sometimes) – from time to time I wish the rest of society were too.
If you had to pick one student that left an impression on you, good or bad- who would it be and Why?
I’m not sure I have any epic tales about children succeeding against the odds; nor do I have any horrendous nightmares to relate. Oh I have taught kids I thought were amazing, kids who have made me proud, kids who have made me fear for my safety… but any one who works with children will have a dozen or more of those stories and be able to tell them better than I can. The pupil who came to mind immediately was none of the above. But she was someone who challenged my perceptions.
She was part of the popular set – she was good looking and she knew it. She was the kind of girl who, lets be honest, just had to smile sweetly and would have any number of boys helping her out with any problem she encountered. Which was just as well – she was one of the least organised people I knew. She regularly forgot to do important tasks, her attendance record was appalling and coursework deadlines were, for her, mere suggestions. She wasn’t even one of my pupils but I had formed a terrible opinion of her. Not that it mattered – she was going to breeze through school just as she would breeze through life.
So I was surprised one day, two hours after the school day had ended, to find her still in school and looking genuinely worried – scared even. She had a deadline. Her final film piece had to be submitted within 48hrs – no extensions – and she hadn’t started. Well, she had filmed some footage but it had no development, no purpose, no nothing. We sat down and began some creative editing. I taught her some tricks of the trade and offered advice when she asked for it – but generally I was just there for reassurance and to make ‘ohhh, that’s good’ sounds every so often. For two days we worked in school till late – I got a LOT of marking done and she completed a rather excellent short film on the issue of abortion.
But that’s not what was memorable – the memorable part was the conversation we had as we worked. Man she was deep. I expected talks about hair colour and partying. Actually we discussed everything from creationism to the war in Afghanistan. And she knew what she was talking about too. My eyes were opened and my preconceptions exploded. Now she helps me out sometimes when she’s home from uni and I'm filming a wedding or something. She has a good eye for a nice shot and I always look forward to our conversations – so she’s memorable because she’s the first pupil I would actually consider a friend.
What is one thing that you wouldn’t want parents/ students to know about you?
If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that my pupils ALWAYS find out what I try to hide. For instance – I spend so much time cultivating a respectable image with my suit and tie, quality reading material jauntily tucked under my arm, and my polished black shoes; but it’s always ruined on the first warm day of summer when I have to take off my jacket and they see the tattoo on my shoulder through my shirt. If they ever see the photos of me with bright red hair and ear and brow piercings I may retire.
Do you have a favourite quote or mantra?
I don’t really have one – but being an Eng Lit teacher I do use:
“This above all – to thine own self be true.”
far too much. It had to be Shakespeare, didn’t it?
If I said: “Must be easy to have your summers off…” you would reply: ___________
Yes, it’s wonderful. And the two weeks off at Christmas is good too – you should do it to. Totally! Become a teacher like us. Think of the fun we could have with our long holidays together – we could wear garish Hawaiian shirts and have barbeques - we could visit a petting zoo and adopt a goat called Olaf… …What? You don’t want to be a teacher?... Why ever not if we have it so easy?... think of the long holidays... think of wonderful pension plan… think of Olaf!!!
(Sorry Mr. C.)
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