If you don’t know about my love of all things A-mac by now you mustn’t have bothered reading much of this blog. I am such an apple-phile that I have a big chunk bitten out of the side of my head. Yep I am, and have always been, a sucker for anything apple. From my days writing articles for the school newspaper on a Mac Classic, through typing up my final year dissertation on a Powermac G3, to moving my entire music collection onto itunes and ipod – I have always loved anything mac. And part of this is a desire to own an iphone. Or was.
You see my faith has been broken. And not because of anything to do with the company or the products themselves. It’s the people that own them. I have come to realise that people who own iphones are the rudest, least considerate people on the planet. Their obnoxiousness and general disregard for life outside a two foot radius of them has made me consider the unconsiderable – getting a Blackberry instead.
[disclaimer: Several of my friends are proud iphone users – and maybe even several of my readers as well. Obviously I am excluding them and you from this rant – clearly you are the exception to the rule.]
You see I went to a concert in Ballymena the other day. My sister got me a ticket to see Juliet Turner in the Braid Centre. It was an excellent concert – the support acts were good, the atmosphere was friendly and intimate. The music was wonderful – the fact that she was suffering from laryngitis only gave her voice a fragile quality that made it a distinct from other renditions – it didn’t harm the performance in any way. I liked her music before I went but I am definitely an even bigger fan for seeing her live. And boy she is tall! When I was leaving I saw her signing CDs in the foyer. I was able to look her in the eye without bending my neck very far – and I’m 6’5”. I thought she must have been standing on a raised platform or something – but no. I checked.
Anyway, it was a wonderful, incredible, amazing, magnificent experience – bar one thing. The existence of iphone owners.
One woman in particular, sitting just in front of me, seemed to need some information urgently and would tap away on her phone, scrolling through hundreds of emails and hold the phone in the air to read it in such a way that the glare from the screen was at its optimum distraction level in the corner of my eye. It must have been important because she did this every thirty seconds throughout the concert.
Then there were the ones further forward who wanted to take a few pictures, or maybe a bit of video to remember the concert by. They would hold up their phones, compose the shot for a while, wait for the perfect moment and take the photo. But in a darkened room I find my eye drawn to shiny objects and – maybe it was just me – I found myself watching Juliet Turner in concert live on a 3 inch screen twenty yards away rather than the real person on the stage. In some cases when the phone operator had decided to video her I found myself watching the screen for the entire song.
Now maybe it is just me. Maybe I am hypersensitive about these things and need to learn to relax more. Maybe I just like complaining – but it really seems that iphone users can’t ever just put their phones away for a while. They have to be fiddling with them all the time. There were several hundred other people in that auditorium, most of whom are likely to have mobile phones. Yet it was only the iphone users I noticed. Why? BECAUSE THEY WERE WAVING THEM AROUND FOR TWO HOURS!!! It’s hard not to notice them.
Anyway, if my sister is reading this – thank you for the tickets. I really enjoyed the concert. If the people we were with are reading this – it was good to see you all again. It was a good night. Let’s do it again some time. If Juliet Turner is reading this – I was so impressed with everything you did. You are incredible and I will remember that concert for a long time. If iphone users are reading this – learn what a pocket is for. If you need to use your phone then use it… and then put it away… for more than thirty seconds.
You see my faith has been broken. And not because of anything to do with the company or the products themselves. It’s the people that own them. I have come to realise that people who own iphones are the rudest, least considerate people on the planet. Their obnoxiousness and general disregard for life outside a two foot radius of them has made me consider the unconsiderable – getting a Blackberry instead.
[disclaimer: Several of my friends are proud iphone users – and maybe even several of my readers as well. Obviously I am excluding them and you from this rant – clearly you are the exception to the rule.]
You see I went to a concert in Ballymena the other day. My sister got me a ticket to see Juliet Turner in the Braid Centre. It was an excellent concert – the support acts were good, the atmosphere was friendly and intimate. The music was wonderful – the fact that she was suffering from laryngitis only gave her voice a fragile quality that made it a distinct from other renditions – it didn’t harm the performance in any way. I liked her music before I went but I am definitely an even bigger fan for seeing her live. And boy she is tall! When I was leaving I saw her signing CDs in the foyer. I was able to look her in the eye without bending my neck very far – and I’m 6’5”. I thought she must have been standing on a raised platform or something – but no. I checked.
Anyway, it was a wonderful, incredible, amazing, magnificent experience – bar one thing. The existence of iphone owners.
One woman in particular, sitting just in front of me, seemed to need some information urgently and would tap away on her phone, scrolling through hundreds of emails and hold the phone in the air to read it in such a way that the glare from the screen was at its optimum distraction level in the corner of my eye. It must have been important because she did this every thirty seconds throughout the concert.
Then there were the ones further forward who wanted to take a few pictures, or maybe a bit of video to remember the concert by. They would hold up their phones, compose the shot for a while, wait for the perfect moment and take the photo. But in a darkened room I find my eye drawn to shiny objects and – maybe it was just me – I found myself watching Juliet Turner in concert live on a 3 inch screen twenty yards away rather than the real person on the stage. In some cases when the phone operator had decided to video her I found myself watching the screen for the entire song.
Now maybe it is just me. Maybe I am hypersensitive about these things and need to learn to relax more. Maybe I just like complaining – but it really seems that iphone users can’t ever just put their phones away for a while. They have to be fiddling with them all the time. There were several hundred other people in that auditorium, most of whom are likely to have mobile phones. Yet it was only the iphone users I noticed. Why? BECAUSE THEY WERE WAVING THEM AROUND FOR TWO HOURS!!! It’s hard not to notice them.
Anyway, if my sister is reading this – thank you for the tickets. I really enjoyed the concert. If the people we were with are reading this – it was good to see you all again. It was a good night. Let’s do it again some time. If Juliet Turner is reading this – I was so impressed with everything you did. You are incredible and I will remember that concert for a long time. If iphone users are reading this – learn what a pocket is for. If you need to use your phone then use it… and then put it away… for more than thirty seconds.
6 comments:
There is little that irks me more than a rude person who is lost in awe over their iphone or Blackberry. Ugh. Here, it is both. The blackberry is the most pretentious "status" symbol in this area of the world.
I've been on first dates with men who constantly checked their phones, and who were sufficiently distracted by them that I wondered whether they were even aware they were still on a date with me, or their phone! Needless to say, there was no second date.
The onslaught of cell phones has caused mass rudeness among the human race. I turn mine to vibrate on a date (I do have kids, so I have to leave it handy in an emergency) but ONLY answer it if it is one of my kids. I turn it OFF during movies and anything else that requires me to be polite, and quiet.
But I urge you to reconsider. It is those rude people that should be punished, not Apple. It is a fantastic product, much better than blackberry, and does so many cool things. I dont think you'll become "like them".
hmm. you make a good case. but I also have a bit of an affinity for the town where the blackberry was invented. I studied there and I had a great job serving coffee through the night there. So I feel like I should give it a go in loyalty to my old university - just the once. I'll save the iphone for generation 4.
oh and thank you for your faith that I won't succomb to iphobnoxiousness. But I am a wek man so who knows.
Sam... Sam... Sam... Where to begin...?
I have to admit, I'm a serial iPhone addict and have had to, on occasion, physically distance myself from the tiny wonder in order to remove myself from the temptations of constant use.
You see, there IS something about the touchy-feely, tactile smoothness of the iPhone that simply invites use. Those rude iPhone users weren't checking their emails because they had to... they were doing it bacause the act of doing so was an enjoyable one.
Admittedly, their choice of venue to exhibit their iPhone-love might have been a little off-putting and, on behalf of these rude technophiles, I offer you a wholehearted apology... But spare a thought for them, for they hold in their hands (or pockets) a piece of user-friendly technology so well-designed, constructed and implemented that they itch with frustration every time it's out of their grasp...
iPhone owners are no ruder than Blackberry owners, Sony-Ericsson users or the sad souls with a Motorola in their pocket (pity THEM!!). No, they are just blazing the technology trail with childish glee at the wondrous possibilities - quite literally - at their fingertips...
...and loving it!
Postscript: On re-reading this comment, I notice it has been written in the style of a Jeremy Clarkson auto review... If you feel like it, you might want to slide into a pair of jeans, don a faux tweed jacket and grow a ridiculous Surrey-afro before reading...
I had a feeling you might contribute to this one M&A. And while I agree with a lot of what you're saying I have to reiterate the point that it was iphone users who were displaying their lack of consideration that night - just iphone users (don't ask how I managed to take the photo that accompanies the post).
Now maybe the fact that I couldn't see any nokias, lgs, samsungs, sony ericcsons or (say it soft), motorolas, was due to the embarrassment of their owners - or maybe I couldn't see them through the blinding glare created by the iphones - but the fact remains that iphone users are just plain rude. And thats that.
ps - tried the clarkson afro but found that my rapidly receding hair won't allow it. I will make do with tight jeans and a raised eyebrow.
You clearly have never worked for a company where a blackberry is the sign of power and displayed as such.
Two things in my head (I recognise this may not be real but the product of apple marketing):
1) iphone = mobile, cool, twitter, apps, young
2) blackberry - business, sales calls, emails, walking & talking, middle-mangement but with an attitude.
People are idiots regardless of their phones (if we had pigeons instead of phones then that woman would have been feeding hers whether it made noise or not) but give me a iphone user over a blackberry user anyday*
bob
* Obama is the exception that proves the rule......
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