who to vote for...

Dave presents a rather unnerving projection of the state of the union after the various regional and national elections facing us in the next few years.

voters in Northern Ireland will probably elect the unashamedly fundamentalist Protestant leader Ian Paisley and ex-IRA commander Martin McGuinness into power.

Inevitable

The Welsh Assembly elections on May 3 may well result in the formation of a Labour-Plaid Cymru coalition

 Scarey

Scottish National Party has a sneezing chance of winning the keys to Edinburgh’s sparkling parliament building on the same day

Scarier

Feelings of ecstatic liberation at having a nationalist party in power may prompt the Scots to vote in a referendum for independence... Sinn Fein would then claim the UK is effectively dead. and it could tell its followers to expect formal Irish unity by 2021... Isolated Protestants in the northwest of Ulster would start talking about negotiating a separate union with England and Wales.

Scariest

I have to admit that I have a tiny wicked desire to see this happen - just for the sheer interest of it all. At the same time I would probably emmigrate so I could witness the excitement from a safe distance.

In a few weeks I will head off to a local primary school to vote (lucky primary school teachers must get the day off.) I will (dv) definitely vote - I take that responsibility seriously. The thing is, at this stage I have absolutely no idea who I will be voting for.

I'm not one of those tribalists who votes for the party his father, grandfather and Noah voted for. And I'm not of the opinion that your vote is defined by the Church you attend - why restrict your opinions to two or three parties because the rest go to mass on a Saturday night instead of heading down to the local RP, FP or P on a Sabbath morning?

What are my options? Well, in my area the DUP are hot favourites to take all that they survey. Despite their reluctance to enter into power sharing they're not so reluctant when it comes to electioneering. Within hours of the election date being announced they had their banner up in the most prominent position Coleraine has to offer. My major problem with them is that I disagree with their policies on the Environment and Education. I would find it hard to vote for someone who doesn't share my principles when it comes to Education.

Next up we have Sinn Fein. Its hard to trust ex terrorists as a rule. It's even harder to trust ex terrorists who can talk for twenty minutes without actually saying anything or can turn a valid criticism of republicanism into a damning indictment of the british government. I admire the strides they've taken - but am I ready to vote for them? I'm not so sure.

The SDLP. Where Sinn Fein can turn a position of weakness into a position of strength the SDLP are adept at the return journey. I was very disappointed with their handling of the policing situation in recent times and it really shook my faith. They need to work hard to regain respect in the community.

UUP. The Ulster Unionist have had a hard time of it lately. Has a stint in opposition done them good? Not a bit of it. Instead of fighting tooth and nail to regain power the UUP have been practically anonymous. Oh, I must admit Reg Empey did call the DUP naive on Friday... that'll have them quaking. While the DUP and Sinn Fein have been painting to country red, blue, white, green and gold for weeks I saw my first UUP banner two days ago. It's like they are counting on past glories and I think somebody needs to tell them that the recent past hasn't been very glorious for them.

The Alliance Party. Good old yellow pages. They're the party we'd like to vote for but never do. They say nice things and paint a lovely bright yellow future. Unfortunately they have all the bite of a box of stale cornflakes. Maybe someday... but not today.

As for the rest, Conservative Party (the tories?! I think not), Green Party (like Alliance but more green than yellow), Make Politicians History (funny name - not much else), People Before Profit (Socialism is much easier to say), Procapitalism (probably invite the People Before Profit folk round for tea all the time), Progressive Unionist Party (interesting bunch - their bark tends to be louder than their bite), Socialist Environmental Alliance (appear to be mixing the greens with alliance - makes a greeny yellow I think), Socialist Party (more honestly named than the PBP lot), United Kingdom Independence Party (UKIP?!? you can't be serious), Workers Party (if all the workers in the country voted for them I reckon they'd stand a better chance.)

I'll look into the Independent's when I have an hour to waste. Maybe by March I will have a better idea of who to vote for. I hope I do. Is it possible to put -1 -2 and -3 instead of 1,2 and 3 on your ballot paper?