two short planks

Two Short Planks

They sat me in the classroom

And said I had to wait.

They gave me sheets of paper

And said, ‘Now write the date.’

And when I said I couldn’t,

‘I’ve got a special need.’

They sat me in the corner

And gave me books to read.

And when I said I couldn’t,

They laughed and took the mick,

The teacher sighed and shook his head.

A kid said I was thick.

So then they said, ‘Fill in this form,

We have to know your name.’

I said, ‘Well, I can TELL you that.’

They said it wasn’t quite the same.

They sharpened me a pencil

To write out my address

And then I said I couldn’t

When the page became a mess.

I don’t know what my problem is,

I’m lost and all at sea.

A book’s a bolted, padlocked door

I just can’t find the key.

The words don’t click, the letters fuse,

The flash cards never speak.

‘Break it up and sound it out!’

They tell me twice a week.

And when I say I cannot,

‘It doesn’t seem to work,

’The head of Special Needs gets cross,

And screams and goes berserk.

I can’t think what the answer is,

Believe you me, I’ve tried

To learn that blasted alphabet

Most nights I’ve sat and cried.

But still they give me spelling lists,

Stuff paper in my hand.

And still I’ll feel the utter shame

Till the day they’ll understand.

Unknown