what a difference a word makes.

The summer holidays have come to an end - I needed comfort food. In northern ireland the best comfort food you can buy is a cheesy chip or a chip n' cheese. This classy carb-fest is a lot tastier than it sounds and a lot less healthy. As you eat it you picture your heart clogging - but all the time it's thanking you. Yup, it tastes divine... right up to the point where, about two thirds through, it losses its appeal and tastes like oily, greasey cholesterol with a side order of saturated fat.

I favour it flavoured with hot chilli sauce - the burning sensation feels like penance for the harm I'm causing my health. Today, however I made a mistake. They said they only had sweet chilli sauce - I said fine.

No, it really wasn't fine.
If you think the sound of greasy, curdling cheese melting over greasy chips sounded bad try adding greasy, pink, sickly sweet, curdling sweet chilli mayo to the mix. I haven't recovered yet. I have tried everything from chewing coffee beans to swilling tequila to get rid of the taste.
How can adding the word 'sweet' to something make it so vile. It hurt my addled brain. Sugar sweet, sugar good, honey sweet, honey good, maple syrup sweet, maple syrup good. Sweet Chilli with cheese and chips sweet... really not good.

Let this be a warning to those who like to mess with the english language - ignore words, even pleasant ones, at your peril.